The Campaign to Protect Rural England have created a map showing the ‘tranquil’ regions of the UK.

This got a whole article at bbc online, which it wouldn’t have done if it had been a bit more truer and just said a map of the ‘Countryside’.

Me? I’m a big fan of the countryside, for short periods of time only of course, unlike Peter Cook.

The seafront was quite blowy this morning but not as windy as it was earlier on this morning as can be seen here:

From the BBC: Coastguards put out a warning to shipping after a tornado was seen sweeping along the South Coast just after dawn on Sunday.

They got the caption wrong as it’s actually Brighton Pier.

The tornado was probably nature’s response to this biblical happening in Margate, called Exodus, yesterday:

Well Kimberly-Clark, the makers of Andrex, have decided to shed a third (135) of it’s Brighton workforce. This isn’t great news of course and makes me wonder why this seems to happen to every company based at Trafalgar Place. It has a prison-like quality with those huge gates, maybe they think that some employers will strike back one day.

All the staff wear devices that you use to open doors but maybe they track movement too. And what are those strange plastic things in the ceiling? Yes, it the Big Brother house! It’s much easier to outsource the work after comprehensive ‘time and motion’ surveys. Err, allegedly.

Anyway, don’y buy Andrex, Charmin’s much better, and good luck to all the staff at Kimberly-Clark!

Oh, and here’s the trailer for the new 300 film by Frank Miller. Looks good.

And for a laugh. Here’s a Carry On Camping sketch from Shooting Stars:

It’s good to see that The Argus has changed it’s website for the better. It now has a searchable news items, an RSS feed and permalinks. I might actually start reading it now.

Today’s news has a story on the artist Banksy who carried out some art attacks on Brighton music stores this week. “He took 500 copies of Paris Hilton’s debut album, Paris, and given them his own unique makeover…. On the front there is a sticker which claims her latest singles include “Why Am I Famous?”, “What Have I Done?” and “What Am I For?”… A picture of Paris behind the CD has replaced her head with that of her pet dog and the inlay card which features lyrics to her songs has slogans such as “Every CD you buy puts me even further out of your league” emblazoned across it. One picture has been replaced to show Paris getting out of a car next to a number of homeless people with the slogan “90per cent of success is just showing up.” - Read the whole story here.

It’s also good to see West Ham united on the back and front pages of many newspapers this morning due to the rumours of a Russian buy-out. The Sun lead with “I’m forever blowing Roubles” and had Tony Gale describing the new players as “the two biggest bombshells to hit the East End since the Luftwaffe.“. There a good article in the Independent too. Personally I think West Ham is undervalued at the moment and when the regeneration hits Newham in time for the 2012 Olympics the club could be worth a few more quid. Good business.

From today’s Guardian:

The US government was closely involved in planning the Israeli campaign in Lebanon, even before Hizbullah seized two Israeli soldiers in a cross border raids in July. … several Israeli officials visited Washington, separately, ‘to get a green light for the bombing operation and to find out how much the United States would bear’.”

Isn’t that state sponsored terrorism?

But on a brighter, slightly nerdier note please check out the wonders of resonant frequencies with just the simple use of some salt, a speaker and some card:

Check out the extremely creative Blog of Beau Bo d’Or. Great stuff.

I’ve been following some of the news about the Terrorist suspects caught in a dawn raid in Forest Gate. I grew up a few roads from there and I have extended family dotted all around that area. In fact only last Sunday I was showing my Mum this exact same street in Google Earth as my auntie lives there. As far as I’m aware the Bangladeshi, British and Pakistani community gets along fine there so I hope this doesn’t create any tensions. It just seemed like a strange coincidence when I saw this picture.

Learn a little more about the geography of Iran for the upcoming strategic missile strikes with this handy BBC map.

Keeping with the politics: The American Empire for Dummies.

The athiest’s nightmare. God invented bananas for man as can be seen in this video. It’s so true. Where’s my nearest church? Quick!

I loved the KLF. And since their demise I haven’t really taken a big interest in pop music. You can check out their old videos at popjustice.com Absolutely amazing.

Today’s game: Keepy Uppy Tennis Ball. I managed 90 but the phone rang and put me off.

Stop buying Heat magazine. Get all your US celeb gossip and pictures from justjared.com

Snooker Update: O’Sullivan 5 - 3 Dott. Play resumes this afternoon.

So much has been going on recently. I’m working hard on a couple of web projects that would be finished by now if it wasn’t for Microsoft IIS and Internet Explorer being ‘different’ to the standards. Time to catch up on some posting.

First lets congratulate the Super Hammers for getting through to the FA Cup final and into Europe. With a not very convincing win over Middlesbrough we’ll now face the mighty Liverpool at Cardiff on the 13th of May. That will kick start two months of football madness as I attempt to watch every televised game in the World Cup.

I’ve put another bet on, my third this year. First I put £5 on Lyon (at 20/1) to win the Champions League but they got knocked out in the final minutes of their quarter-final game. Secondly was my big win on the Grand National. Last week I put £5 on Graham Dott to win the World Snooker Championship at 40/1. He needs to win 13 frames to get into the semis and yesterday at close of play he was 10-6 up but he’s currently at 12-11. Is the last minute knock-out about to happen to me again? I could do with another £200.

Brilliant Rolling Stone Magazine interview with Kiefer Sutherland star of 24. Which this season is back to its best.

Some online games. Give them a try:
Lemmings on your broswer.
3D Logic. Starts off easy but soon gets hard.

Great news: “a dose of PT-141 results, in most cases, in a stirring in the loins in as little as 15 minutes. Women, according to one set of results, feel ‘genital warmth, tingling and throbbing’, not to mention ‘a strong desire to have sex’“. Old age isn’t looking so bad after all!

Oh, and hear what one of those middle of London street evangelists has to say over a coffee. Interview at b3ta.

SNOOKER UPDATE:
12-12 all, deciding frame. Dott 51 - 37 Robertson. So close. The games already been going on for 30 minutes.

SNOOKER UPDATE:
This is getting too intense. Robertson is now 23 behind with 18 on the table. He needs snookers. Come on Dott!!

SNOOKER UPDATE:
Excellent! The tiny Scot did it! He may have to beat Ronnie O’Sullivan to get to the final though so I can’t celebrate yet.

Just heard on Radio Five Live:
Presenter: “Tiger Woods has received condemnation from charities after saying he ‘played like a spaz’ during last weekend’s play at Augusta. On the line now is a ten year old boy with cerebal palsy…”

I also see that Dave Morgan, the “former fiancé of Jessie Wallace”, has sold another story to The Sun. He must be hard up. The headline is “Coke used like After Eights”, which is odd as I always thought you put coke up your nose. It’s just sad to see an “ex-PC” making money off selling three year old stories to the press. I just remember seeing a clip from The Farm (Five) where Flavor Flav asks him what he does and Morgan responds by saying “I dated a soap star” - the look on Flavor Flav’s face, ha! I would like to point out that I read the free online version of this paper.

Popped into the new British Bookshops & Stationers today on Western Road. It’s the new version of Sussex Stationers but bigger, cleaner and the products were actually labelled with their price, take note Woolworths and Robert Dyas (the price slackers of Western Rd). All the staff were really friendly and helped me find a few bits and bobs I was looking for, apart from one. The security guard was casting a shadow around me the whole time I was there. Occassionally I looked at him and he didn’t even look away that quickly. It was so full on though that if he does it again I’ll complain. I’m paying your wages, Sunshine! (Well £4 of it anyway).