It seems too good to be true but the news is that West Ham United have signed Carlos Tevez and Javier Mascherano from Corinthians.

From The Guardian: “The move is nothing short of sensational: never before have two world-class players yet to reach their prime - both are only 22 - rejected a host of elite clubs in order to join a middling one. However, while it true that West Ham are on the up with Alan Pardew at the helm and exciting talents such as Anton Ferdinand, Yossi Benayoun and Nigel Reo-Coker .

It is unquestionably a major coup for Pardew and gives last season’s FA Cup runners-up one of the most impressive-looking squads in the Premiership.”

Oh, and from YouTube here’s a cute panda.

Stevie Wonder’s six minute Sesame Street version of Superstition.

Oh, and for fans of Lost (tonight on C4) I found a detailed image of the writings on the blast door that Locke saw. If you remember correctly they could only be seen when the UV light came on. They’ve translated some of the latin and it could be a bit spoilerish but it’s nothing that UK viewers couldn’t have worked out for themselves if they could pause the action and translate the latin.

Enough of all my doom and gloom. My phone works and there is World peace so lets look at the following:

The Best Week Ever PC Vs Mac adverts.

The Google Maps Flight Simulator. Just use your arrow keys to move around and ’space’ to fire.

Flash Flash Revolution. Use your mouse in time to the music. This gets very hard after level 3.

And to finish off… Does anybody remember this from Sesame Street? Some 70’s number counting to an acid soul-jazz soundtrack.

“Orange is committed to providing excellent customer services” - Answer message

Well my old ‘3′ number was meant to be transferred on the 18th of August across to Orange. I followed the instructions to the tee but I’ve yet to be transferred. This morning my ‘3′ phone was finally disconnected but Orange haven’t managed to hold up their end of the bargain. I waited for 8 hours but then thought it was time to call them My Orange phone does work, just not with my old number.

Here’s what I’ve been doing over the last 2 hours:
1. Phone 150 on my Orange phone.
2. An automated service tells me to press ‘4′ to discuss my account.
3. Orange doesn’t accept my 4 button at all and repeats the message.
4. After a few times of trying I hang up.
5. My phone then loses it’s signal even though it had full reception before I made the call.
6. Turn the phone off and on and repeat from step 1.

So far Orange have cost me around 8 hours of my life trying to achieve the simple task of registering my phone. They may also have cost me quite a bit of money. I’ve currently been on hold for 30 minutes using my BT landline. I’ll tot up the costs and send a letter to them once my phone is actually working asking for a refund.

My conclusion? Never ever sign up to Orange. If you are a member of Orange then please consider transferring to an alternative supplier. Check out the Carphone Warehouse online and you’ll probably pick up a deal from an alternative suppiler for less than half the price.

Update: My temporary phone number doesn’t work either now. But if I call out using my new Orange phone the number is my old ‘3′ number. That means that the number transfer process is half complete. Unfortunatly nobody can call into the phone, I can just call out.

Update: Looks like my phone is working properly now, at last. You contact me on my normal number.

“Israel has arrested almost one quarter of the members of the Palestinian parliament as part of its campaign to free an Israeli soldier captured on the Gaza border in June.”

From The Guardian

“British mine clearance experts have accused Israel of “carpeting” Lebanese border villages with deadly cluster bombs, claiming that more appeared to have been used than in the American-led invasion of Iraq.”

From The Telegraph

And on a lighter note here’s an 8 minute clip of Rik Mayall, Adrian Edmondson and Midge Ure in Filthy, Rich & Catflap, one of my favourite comedies from the 80’s. Courtesy of YouTube.

Hit the pause button for a minute if you’re having streaming difficulties.

Check out The Official Record Store Cats website for more of these cats. All brilliantly created by HNLDesign.

Over at The V we’ve been raiding YouTube for some classic videos. This is the video for Witness The Fitness by Roots Manuva. I’ve always loved the song but never seen the video. It’s a classic!

Yes, just what I thought. I’m the spitting image of Liv Tyler:

Upload your photo at My Heritage and see who you look like.

From today’s Guardian:

The US government was closely involved in planning the Israeli campaign in Lebanon, even before Hizbullah seized two Israeli soldiers in a cross border raids in July. … several Israeli officials visited Washington, separately, ‘to get a green light for the bombing operation and to find out how much the United States would bear’.”

Isn’t that state sponsored terrorism?

But on a brighter, slightly nerdier note please check out the wonders of resonant frequencies with just the simple use of some salt, a speaker and some card:

Ron Mueck’s Spooning Couple, currently showing at the National Galleries of Scotland in Edinburgh.

“And yet … all is not well. They are not as comfortable, as relaxed, as they seem at first. Both sets of eyes are open - without eye contact. They are thinking. In silence. About what? We can only guess. Her unclothed torso is turned away from his clothed torso. His naked lower half is against her knickers. The T-shirt is unironed, its white muted. The knickers are somehow indeterminate - the faded colour purple that results when whites get washed with items which aren’t colourfast. Romantic it isn’t.” The Guardian.

I’ve seen his ‘boy‘ at the Millennium Dome but his new sculptures look even better.